All That Flickers is Gold

I realize that for smokers, lighters are like gold, and unless that smoker knows exactly where her lighter is when she needs it, she won't search the house like a madperson/bitch. For the record, I am officially three weeks in for NOT smoking. I am proud. I've had my triumphant declines where I appear disciplined enough to pass on a cig, but then I've also had my moments where I'm giving puppy eyes as I covetly watch a friend smoke. At this point, its my longest stride without backsliding to my old ways. The lighter incident was not because I smoked, but because I wanted to light a candle. Let me explain:

This week has been painful. I've been soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo stressed out that I almost craved the simplicity of finals-week in college. So when I was visiting my friends this week, I decided to post up in my room there and light a candle. It was perfect: I had a bed, a quiet house, my own bathroom, and a candle. Shoot, where's the lighter.

A few hours before this, I heard my friend complain about how her roommate always takes her lighters, and how it infuriates her that she "can't even have a fu(dg)ing cigarette break without searching for a lighter." Emblazoned in my own irritation, I could only agree that my friend keep her own lighter by her side at all times to avoid this problem. I mean how inconsiderate for people to take her lighters.

FACT: My friend in fact took my advice and confiscated all lighters she owned to her purse.

PROBLEM: When I went to search the house for a lighter for my candle (after she left), guess what:

I COULDN'T FIND A FU(DG)ING LIGHTER MYSELF!

The moral of the story is: just because you don't smoke doesn't mean you have to hate on other lighter-theiving smokers, because in the end, it'll bite you in the ass too. And want to know what the most ironic part of this was? It made me stress out and want a damn cigarette.

But, :) I didn't. Aren't you proud?